I have to say it's an interesting thing to spend some time at an oncologist's office. It is a serious battleground between living in the moment and pondering over one's life. I sit here chilling, and while I have plenty of work to do, I can't help but listen to the woman sitting next to me talk to the nurse. The conversation vacillates between wanting to eat a piece of pizza for lunch and discussing how this is the time in life that it's beneficial to have a husband or someone to be with you. She discusses how she was completely awful to her ex-husband and especially his new wife. I can't help but wonder how life will be for me should I ever have to go through any of these things. There is so much uncertainty in life.
What I am certain about, and for sure the only thing I am certain about, is my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I am certain of His constancy and continued presence in my life until I am with Him in eternity. I am certain of His great love for me even though I will never deserve it. I am certain that He alone is the keeper of justice and that my imperfect idea of what is just will probably never match His wisdom. I am certain that should I ever have to go through something so serious that I would not be alone for God himself has promised to never leave us. I cling to this truth as the only thing necessary for my joy. It is all I have sometimes, and that's ok.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
So I've been thinking....
If I just got off the grid and pitched a tent somewhere, the following things would be possible:
1. I could forget this school business. I mean who really needs librarians ;)
2. I wouldn't have to go to work anymore.
3. I could stop brushing my hair entirely.
4. I wouldn't have to do laundry quite so much.
5. I could have some chickens, maybe a goat, and put in a garden!
Yea, I'm seeing this as a very real possibility. I just need to get over my Starbucks addiction, and I'll be good to go ;)
1. I could forget this school business. I mean who really needs librarians ;)
2. I wouldn't have to go to work anymore.
3. I could stop brushing my hair entirely.
4. I wouldn't have to do laundry quite so much.
5. I could have some chickens, maybe a goat, and put in a garden!
Yea, I'm seeing this as a very real possibility. I just need to get over my Starbucks addiction, and I'll be good to go ;)
Sunday, February 15, 2009
A Comparison
Getting upset over it being Valentine's Day and not being in a romantic relationship is similar to it being Martin Luther King, Jr. Day and being upset because you're not African-American.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Did he just wave at me?
So I pull myself off the couch and put on some shoes in order to make it to the CVS.
Description of appearance: fugly, as in the bangs were sort of smooshed to one side, the clothes were wrinkled and not matching. I had weird walmart cheap flip flops on and hadn't showered. I'm not being dramatic when I say fugly.
I took a sick day today, and am unfortunately actually sick. I needed to get to CVS in order to purchase my weight in over the counter drugs. I set my filled basket down at the register and the fella proceeds to ring up my goods. He says, "Wow, that's a lot of items to fight a cold." My response is, "Yes, well I was planning on taking them all at the same time. Do you think that will work? Cause I'm wondering if the Dayquil and the Nyquil will actually counteract each other if taken together".
I drag myself to my car, tissues and medicine in hand as I hear someone honking at me. I look up with a disgusted look on my face. He waves. Some random Joe in a scary white van waves at me. no no..HONKS and waves! This is not your ordinary "mom and three kids" kind of van, but a scary, commercial-size, no windows, straight out of a Lifetime movie type white van. He then pulls into the gas station next to the CVS. I get in my car and pull out towards the gas station. We make eye contact again. And would you believe it, AGAIN he waves! He's a little more hesitant this time like "hhhmm is that really the neighbor lady who sits on the back pew at church??" kind of wave. I sort of shrug my shoulders and mouth, "I don't know you dude".
Don't worry, I faked right and took the other exit, and then made sure no one was following me home. I know how those Lifetime movies end. Let's just say it ain't always feel good television.
Description of appearance: fugly, as in the bangs were sort of smooshed to one side, the clothes were wrinkled and not matching. I had weird walmart cheap flip flops on and hadn't showered. I'm not being dramatic when I say fugly.
I took a sick day today, and am unfortunately actually sick. I needed to get to CVS in order to purchase my weight in over the counter drugs. I set my filled basket down at the register and the fella proceeds to ring up my goods. He says, "Wow, that's a lot of items to fight a cold." My response is, "Yes, well I was planning on taking them all at the same time. Do you think that will work? Cause I'm wondering if the Dayquil and the Nyquil will actually counteract each other if taken together".
I drag myself to my car, tissues and medicine in hand as I hear someone honking at me. I look up with a disgusted look on my face. He waves. Some random Joe in a scary white van waves at me. no no..HONKS and waves! This is not your ordinary "mom and three kids" kind of van, but a scary, commercial-size, no windows, straight out of a Lifetime movie type white van. He then pulls into the gas station next to the CVS. I get in my car and pull out towards the gas station. We make eye contact again. And would you believe it, AGAIN he waves! He's a little more hesitant this time like "hhhmm is that really the neighbor lady who sits on the back pew at church??" kind of wave. I sort of shrug my shoulders and mouth, "I don't know you dude".
Don't worry, I faked right and took the other exit, and then made sure no one was following me home. I know how those Lifetime movies end. Let's just say it ain't always feel good television.
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